THUMB SUCKING
It was cute when she was a baby, but now that your child has reached kindergarten age, you're starting to worry about her having her thumb in her mouth all the time. You feel embarrassed when you're out in public with her (What will the neighbors think?) and are concerned about what her peers will say in school.
You're not alone: Pediatricians estimate that somewhere in the neighborhood of 18 percent of children between the ages of two and six suck their thumbs. Why do they start? Various explanations have been suggested, but most experts agree that thumb sucking calms and comforts the child.
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Pediatricians have observed that the phenomena only occurs in western culture, within industrialized societies where children generally begin to spend their time physically separate from their mothers at a very early age. Thumb sucking is uncommon in cultures where mothers tend to hold their babies for long periods or otherwise keep them in physical contact with their bodies throughout their early years.
As you'll read in the tips that follow, most experts discourage parents from trying to stop a child's thumb sucking before the child demonstrates that he or she is ready to stop. If your child has reached that point, read the following home remedies.
If not, try to talk out your frustration with a friend or your spouse and wait a year or two before intervening.
Let the child decide it's a problem. If there's one message that pediatricians have about thumb sucking, it's this: The best way to get a child to continue thumb sucking is to tell him or her to stop. A better strategy is to wait until the child finds an incentive to quit the behavior, such as being teased at school about thumb sucking, and let him or her bring it up. Experts say that addressing the problem when the child is ready is more likely to be successful than attacking it head on and forcing him or her to quit.
Use a reward system. Pediatricians sometimes recommend a game-playing, reward-based system for helping kids stop sucking their thumbs. Try buying a calendar and placing it on the refrigerator. For each day you don't see the child sucking his or her thumb, you can put a smiley-face sticker on the day. At the end of a set period of time, say a month, you can offer a modest reward, such as a toy or dinner at the child's favorite restaurant.
Try ordeal therapy. How about trying a little reverse psychology? Point out to a thumb-sucking child that he or she isn't being fair to the other fingers -- so why not suck them, too? Give the child a timer and explain that it's important to suck all fingers for the same duration. Often, the child will grow so tired of the process that they quit thumb sucking altogether. The only problem with this type of approach is that kids are likely to see through it when it comes from a parent (they know the parent really wants them to stop altogether). If you suspect that this will be the case, a pediatrician or close friend of the family may be able to help.
Offer the child the option of thumb sucking in private. Consider your efforts a success if the child quits thumb sucking in front of you or in public. Don't worry, the relatively brief time a child can spend sucking on a thumb in private won't be long enough to cause other problems.
Never use negative reinforcement. If the child has a slip, it may be destructive to use a negative reward, such as placing a sad-faced sticker on a calendar date. Failure has a nasty way of perpetuating itself.
Try "reminder fluid." Although some doctors see it as cruel, others recommend the use of bad-tasting fluids that are put on the thumb to keep the child from putting it in his or her mouth. However, don't use this method as a punishment. Rather, stress the positive by telling the child that the fluid will help by serving as a reminder of his or her goal. As an alternative, parents can place a glove or mitten on the child's hand as a reminder to keep the thumb out of the mouth.
Start with the easy stuff, then move on. First, you might suggest that the child stop thumb sucking while in public, or some other time when he or she is most likely to comply. Then you can move on to the times when the habit is most ingrained, such as bedtime. You may want to double rewards if the child doesn't suck his or her thumb during the more challenging times.
Don't yell. Although you may feel frustrated when your child slides back into his or her thumb-sucking behavior, don't punish or yell at the child. You will only make him or her nervous and upset, which will probably lead to more thumb sucking.
Wait it out. You know what happens to most kids who suck their thumbs at four, five, or even six years of age? They stop. Parents often notice that children engage in the habit a bit less with each passing year, or perhaps only suck their thumbs at certain times, such as when they're tired or watching television. Pediatricians say that many children give up thumb sucking altogether by age six or seven because of peer pressure -- ribbing from friends and schoolmates shames them into stopping.
Home Remedy Treatments for Thumb Sucking
Persistent thumb sucking in older children may be a symptom of emotional distress. He or she may be plagued by feelings of sadness or anxiety, and thumb sucking may continue to be a form of self comfort. If this sounds like your child, insisting that he or she stop thumb sucking will only make matters worse. Instead, try to discover the source of your child's sadness or anxiety.
Parents often begin to worry about a child if he or she continues thumb sucking past age four or five. While it's perfectly normal to be concerned that the child's habit reflects poorly on your parenting skills, it's counterproductive to let your son or daughter know how upset you are or use wrongheaded measures to make the child stop thumb sucking. But what are the potential consequences if your child does not quit by this age, as most do?
According to the American Dental Association, thumb sucking can lead to problems if it persists after permanent teeth have come in. The constant sucking can cause misalignment of teeth and affect the proper growth of the mouth. The severity of the problem seems to depend on a child's individual sucking style: Kids who simply rest their thumbs on their tongues tend to have fewer problems than children who suck vigorously.
As a child reaches school age, thumb sucking could pose social problems. In one study, first-graders were shown photos of two seven-year-old kids. In one set of photos, the children were sucking their thumbs, in the second set they were not. The first-graders rated children in the thumb-sucking pose as less intelligent, happy, attractive, and desirable as friends. Psychologists say thumb suckers are frequent targets of teasing.
Other potential problems for children who suck their thumbs chronically include infections of the thumbnail, thumb malformation, and the possibility of poisoning (if a child touches a toxic substance before inserting a thumb in the mouth).
There are a variety of dental devices that can be used to help a child stop thumb sucking, but only use one if the child accepts it. Forcing a child to use such a device can damage a child's psyche, which can be harder to fix than misaligned teeth.
Thumbing sucking can be a vexing problem for parents. Understanding the origins, as well as a strategy for breaking your child of the habit, can give you peace of mind.
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